Physical Prowess
THE FIVE-DAY IRONMAN CHALLENGE:
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DAY ONE:
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​- Breakfast: bacon, eggs, bacon, eggs, bacon, eggs, no toast
- Watch ‘The Gilded Age’ without sleeping
- 20 deadlifts, 340 lbs.
- walk backwards 10,000 steps
DAY TWO:
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- Kill a mountain lion* (*-cougar)
- Watch ‘The Gilded Age’ without dying
- Hot stone planking (three hours)
- Biff 60 pounds of blood diamonds
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DAY THREE:
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- Quadathlon (one biathlon times two, or do a biathlon again)
- Rub out four storylines for season three of ‘The Gilded Age’
- Alternate 25 reps each, laxatives and diuretics
- 10 rounds - Muay Thai combat (nearest elementary school, don’t get cocky)
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DAY FOUR:
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- Lunch with Mom (four courses, Chardy throughout)
- Nap
- Dig secret tunnel (bare hands)
- Bowl until knowing score by hand (three days)
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DAY FIVE:
- 300 reps - lay down/sit up/stand up/pull up/reverse
​- Watch 12 hours - YouTube (no suicidal ideation)
- 10 rounds – Muay Thai combat (spouse, suggest polyamory)
- Read ‘Brief History of Time’ (backwards)
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